Burn Rove, Burn

Oh, how glorious it is to watch Scott McClellan squirm under the relentless questioning of the suddenly awakened White House press corps, and to imagine even more uncomfortable anxiety going on in the seedy west-wing offices as Karl Rove shleps his soulless body around barking orders at misguided Yale grads to do something, anything, just find him a fucking terrorist attack to exploit. As if snapped out of a Katie Holmesian trance, the press corps actually seems mildly interested in a story not spoon fed to them from the Administration's all-powerful press communication machine. Maybe they felt a little well-deserved shame at the idea that one of the national press' biggest hacks in Judy Miller inadvertently becoming its biggest martyr. And now, at least until they are frightened back into their proper place, we get to watch Scottie and George W. tell us they simply will not comment on an ongoing investigation - after happily commenting several times during the last year on it - in their usual ironicless tone.

We should enjoy the show now while it lasts, because it will be fleeting. If the last five years has taught us anything it should be that Karl Rove and the administration will weather this storm and emerge virtually unscathed. Hell, they will probably use this scandal as a pretext to invade Syria or to elect Jeb Bush President or to somehow have a law passed that forbids blacks from serving in Congress. The point is, it's not wise to start underestimating Karl. Listen, any person with even the slightest amount of political savvy knew that Rove was involved in the Plame leak the moment it happened, so this is really no great revelation. It was an obvious political move on the part of the White House (as convincing the American people that war is necessary always is), and Karl Rove is the political wing of the White House. I simply cannot imagine that Rove tolerates leaks of that caliber to happen without his express consent. Hell, Rove keeps his hand so deep up each of his puppet's asses, he doesn't even let his prize moron go to a debate without being wired up.

But for now at least, we get to be delighted by the tortured defenses of Karl from the rightwing pundits. John Gibson, a Foxnewswhore with a curiously familiar shtick, thinks that Rove should get a medal for the leak rather than potentially go to jail (let us put aside the matter of why John Gibson's medal-awarding threshold is so low - he probably thinks I deserve the congressional medal of honor for telling this homeless guy on the bus this morning all about Valerie Plame). The editorial boys at the Wall Street Journal tend to agree, as they applaud Rove for simply telling America the truth about Wilson - because lord knows we all gave a flying fuck whether his wife suggested he go the Niger or not. I know I did, under the arbitrary notion that you can't trust what anyone whose wife attempts to get them a job. Why are we to be incredulous of what Joe Wilson has to say about Iraqis purchasing yellow-cake because his wife suggested the CIA send him (she doesn't run the fucking place, someone else there must have agreed that it was OK as well)? First of all, its more than just a little bit suspect when the Administration claims concern over Valerie Plame's role in Wilson's assignment - Do they actually expect us to believe that they are strong opponents of nepotism? If they believed that, George W. Bush would still be lying in a pool of his own vomit in a downtown Houston motel after a long-night of jenga and hooker sex.

Apparently, Rove, a well-known defender of truth and justice in America, was simply correcting a dangerous misapprehension by leaking the information. It's a shame he didn't take credit for his altruistic deeds earlier than now, when Scott McClellan was saying how ridiculous it is to suggest he had anything to do with it. If only they could of anticipated the right wing's current spin job, they could of really set it up this heroic whistleblower bullshit better. The point they are all so purposely missing though is that is doesn't make the slightest difference whether Rove was leaking the information for sheer revenge or to protect America from the lying scourge that is Joe Wilson. If he outed a CIA operative intentionally, it was illegal and he continues to be the monstrous asshole we always knew he was. The preferred tactic now is to argue about whether Joe Wilson did in fact understate his wife's role in him being sent to Niger and whether he was anti-war. Crazy-ass John Gibson even referred to him as a peacenik (despite his support for the first Gulf War, his support of several republican causes and his wife's role as an undercover CIA operative) as if that matters in the slightest bit. Only in America can a begiantspectacled albino loudmouth newsgeek like John Gibson (see below) use the word "cojones" on national television with complete sincerity and call a guy like Joe Wilson a peacenik without getting the shit kicked out of him in the Fox news parking lot.

Yes, this guy:

Based on historical precedent, the best way for Karl to get out of the current morass is to remind the American people how fucked up the right wing is on some other hot button issue, like appointing Supreme court judges, and we will forget all about this Plame nonsense. Scottie will tell everyone that George wants a brilliant, tough strict-constructionist who will not legislate from the bench, will then appoint a right-wing lunatic that likes to wipe his/her ass with the Bill of Rights and the media, as predicted, will grab firmly a hold of the next rope and let go of this one. Or Karl could just get Robert Novak to kidnap some white girl and we will all forget how to spell CIA.